Deadbeat Dad Gives 1 Million Dollars to His College!...

I could not believe my eyes when I read that a deadbeat dad, who has refused to pay child support for years and owes $45,000 in back support, has bequested one million dollars to Michigan State University.

Is this unbelievable? This man has a million dollars to give away to a college, yet has refuses to support his two children. Greg Bradbury has acknowledged he had not paid child support but will not say why other than that "is is a very personal matter".

So this poor excuse for a father gets to choose whether or not he supports his kids? Apparently, since the state of Minnesota gave up on enforcing the child support order when his children turned 18, citing heavy caseloads. Katherine Bradbury, the mother of the two children was even told that " if I had been on public assistance, they would have been much more helpful."

There are many "father's rights" groups whining and complaining about how unfair child support is and how men never deserve to be punished for non-payment of child support because they cannot afford it.. I wonder how they will defend this guy? This man has at least one million dollars stored away to give to the University upon his death, yet cannot cough up the $45,00o in back child support he owes his children? I sincerely hope the state of Minnesota will freeze his assets and bring him into court. This man should be made an example of.

Find out the three things you must know to have a successful divorce outcome......

Does Your Ex Let His Girlfriend Sleep Over While Your Kids Are Visiting?

Dealing with your ex's new girlfriend is hard enough, but finding out she is sleeping over your ex's house while your kids are visiting can be too much to bear. The thought of another woman playing mommy to your kids for the weekend can fill you with rage, especially if you are in the early stages of your divorce and you have not had a chance to mourn the death of your marriage and work through all of the emotions divorce stirs up.

It is even worse if the woman in your ex's life is the same woman who broke up your marriage. During my own divorce my ex's mistress moved into his house. He had the kids for overnight visitation every other weekend and she was there, spending time with my children. Although it bothered me, I initially tried to accept the situation and give her a chance. That was until my youngest daughter, who was only about 6 at the time, came home and told me that she had slept in the same bed with this woman. Naturally, I was upset and called my lawyer. I was told that unless his girlfriend was a danger to my children, he was within his rights to have her sleep over when the children were there. I did however instruct my ex that under no cirumstances was my daughter to share a bed with his girlfriend. Thankfully, my ex eventually broke up with his woman.

If you are uncomfortable with your ex's girlfriend sleeping voer while your children are present there is very little you can do legally. You can try talking to your ex and setting rules and boundaries. Can they not share the same bed while your kids are there? Is it possible for her to sleep at a friend's or relative's house or if she does not live with your ex, stay at her own home during visitations?

As difficult as it is for you to have the ex's girlfriend sleeping over while your kids are there, imagine how the kids must feel. They have already been through their parent's divorce and it will take time for them to accept a new mate for either of their parents. The best way to introduce a new partner to take it slow. If your ex refuses to cooperate, then it is your job to explain to the kids about their Dad's new love and help them work through any conflicting emotions.

Then, in private, it is your turn to deal with the painful emotions this situation has caused. Feelings like anger, resentment, jealousy, and not wanting your ex to be happy are perfectly normal. Do not try and suppress them. Work through them and then try and let them go. Eventually you will reach a place where you can accept your ex's new girlfriend in your children's lives as long as she treats them well and is a positive role model.

LIES, DAMNED LIES AND STATISTICS

The front page of The Litigation Letter that landed on my desk today boasts the headline “Family Meltdown”. It’s a clear quotation from Mr Justice Coleridge’s speech at the recent Resolution annual conference. However, this article also quotes figures which it says show that the marriage rate in England & Wales has dropped to its lowest level (236,980) since 1895 when the population was presumably considerably smaller than it is now. At the same time the article claimed that the divorce rate has increased to its highest level at 45%, with 10% of marriages lasting less than 5 years.

With figures of this magnitude being quoted, no wonder it’s so easy for those in power to lambast single parents and the breakdown in family life for the ills of society including wayward adolescents, school truancy, bullying, drug abuse, crime and teenage pregnancies. What the figures clearly show, of course, is that cumbersome, outdated divorce laws do nothing to keep marriages together. Quite what the Government intends to do about it though is another issue, especially when we still need some proper laws to regulate the break up of relationships between those couples who opt simply to live together and don’t therefore even feature in these statistics.

Of course, if you are fortunate enough that your marriage has subsisted happily for 5 years or more, what is also suggested (assuming consistency in mortality and divorce rates) is that it is too early to start planning your 60th wedding anniversary. Apparently only 10% of couples marrying today will survive to make those celebrations; whilst purportedly 45 % will divorce, another 45% will be separated by death, because the average age for marrying itself has increased to 31.8 for men and 29.7 for women. That means that the couples who do make it will, on average, presumably be 91.8 and 89.7 years of age. Further, 10% of the number quoted for couples marrying means that 23,698 couples a year should attain this achievement; now that’s what I call success. I knew I’d find something promising in those figures somewhere.

Are You Dating A Divorced Man? Know What You are Getting Into...

If you are dating a divorced man with children, you need to fully understand what you are getting yourself into. It irks me when women date a divorced man and then complain that their boyfriend is paying too much child support and alimony.

Give me a break. You have to expect that if your boyfriend has an ex-wife and kids, he must fulfill his financial and parental obligations to his first family. Dating a divorced man is not like dating a man who has never been married before. Many women knowingly date these men and then get upset when he does not have the money or the time to spend on them.

Any decent man will put his kids first before your relationship. If you are not willing to accept the baggage that comes with dating a divorced man you should date someone who has never been married. Here are few things to expect while dating a divorce man:

1. Unless he is wealthy, he will have less money to spend on dinners out, vacations and other luxuries.

2. He will be spending time with his children. If you want him all to yourself, you are out of luck.

3. He must deal with his ex-wife when it comes to raising his children. You need to accept her as part of his life and get over your resentment.

Finally, if you plan on marrying a divorced man and want to have children, do not complain that there will be less money for your household because he pays child support. You knew about his obligations to his children before you married him. Also be aware that you will have a whole new set of issues with step children. There is nothing wrong with dating a divorced man and you can have a wonderful relationship, if you go into it with your eye wide open and know what to expect.

Are Children of Divorce Spoiled?...

When you are going through a divorce, you naturally worry about your kids and how they will cope with the breakup of your marriage. Telling your kids about the divorce is painful and you want to protect them and make sure their lives are not disrupted or changed anymore than they have to be.

Parents often feel guilty about getting a divorce and it is normal to give your child extra attention during this difficult time. But all too often, in divorced families, one or both parents will start slacking with discipline. They are afraid that they will upset the child if they enforce the rules. Ironically, because of the divorce, kids will act out and behave badly. So it becomes a situation where the children are out of control and the parents are feeling too guilty to discipline them.

Children are smart and can sense when mom and dad are feeling guilty. They will exploit this weakness. What you need to remember is that the kids will do better if the rules that were in place before the divorce are still there after it. Kids crave structure and security. The best thing you can do for you kids during a divorce is to maintain your child's lifestyle without making too many changes too quickly. Sticking to your routines and familiar disciplinary measures will give your child a sense of security during your divorce.

THE SILLY FILLY

Despite earlier resolutions I am unable to resist the opportunity to blog again about the Silly Filly and the Ex. They are no longer an item. He’s had a breakdown and she drove him to it. She abandoned him in the fast lane from where he was transported to a specialist body and recovery centre.

I can’t wait to honk the horn and wave at the Silly Filly as she queues at the bus stop in the morning.

For the beginning of this saga of woe, click here

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