HOW LONG A JOURNEY?

On Friday I travelled to London in order to fulfil a business commitment. There was a time when getting to and from London from the North–East in a day was nigh on impossible because of the length of the journey or alternatively the temptation to stay on afterwards and take in some of the Big City atmosphere was irresistible. This time I travelled there and back in less than 2 ½ hours each way, returning in time to spend more or less the whole of my Friday evening at home. There had been no temptation to spend longer in London and with my meeting and journey over, I was just happy to get on with my day to day life.

Sitting on the train I mused over the fact that these days clients too rarely want to linger over their separations, preferring to move onto divorce on immediate grounds than to wait until they have lived apart for two years. Like me in London, they want to be able to put their commitment and journey behind them and then get on with the resumption of some kind of normality as soon as possible.

This Dad Should be Ashamed of Himself...

Dow Jones heir Jeffery Stevenson lied about his income and hid assets during his divorce in an attempt to reduce child support payments to his child. He told the court he was only making $38,000 a year as a Carpenter and was ordered to pay only $512 a month in child support. He child even qualified for reduced free lunches.

It was recently revealed that Stevenson failed to disclose trust funds worth at least $4 million during his 1997 divorce. At a trial in 2007, Stevenson admitted he was not a professional carpenter and testified his net worth was $17 million. He also receives at least $358,000 in annual income from five different trust funds, In addition he owna a $3.3 million home in Key Largo, Fla., $600,000 in other real estate and $275,000 in vehicles. His child support payments have been increased to $5,500 a month and he will have to pay at least $160,00 in retroactive child support payments and his ex-wife's attorney fees.

How pathetic. This man knowingly allowed his child to live in poverty while he lived like a king!

Thankfully, justice has been served in this case, but how many other parents are out there who have hid assets during a divorce and lied about their income and are getting away with it? Sadly, the men and women who commit these acts think they are getting over on their exes but the they are hurting their own children instead.

If you have reason to believe your ex is hiding assets or lying about income, then you need to be proactive and find the proof you need to take him or her back to family court. It won't be easy, but with a little detective work you may be able to uncover hidden money you never knew your ex had. There are many online websites that can track down a person's assets and current employer. Do some research first so that you know you are dealing with a reputable company and most of all, don't give up! Your children's financial future and quality of life is at stake.

Click here to read a free chapter of Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce...

When Your Kids Do What They Did

I was waking my daughter up this morning and she did this "thing." It was a thing that her dad used to do when we were married. I imagine that he does it now too, I am just not there to see it. When she was doing it, I was reflecting on him, even after all this time, I am reminded because of her. It was nice.Then, I tried to get my oldest up and out of bed and it was a struggle. I was reminded

This Is The Hamptons...

In 1926 Fitzgerald published one of his finest stories, ''The Rich Boy,'' whose narrator begins it with the words ''Let me tell you about the very rich. They are different from you and me.''

More than 80 years later that statement rings as true today as it did then. Though Christie Brinkley opened up the east end to ridicule this summer with her high profile divorce, she is far from the only one from the east end showing us all here how different our lives are "Up Island." I actually found myself threatening to tell a judge in Central Islip about the extravagant spending of one litigant and expressing my belief that the judge would be appalled at such a revelation. The response to me shocked me all the more...."This is the Hamptons" I was told, as if this readily explained the extravagance that was displayed before me. Excess is Excess, whether it be in the Hamptons, Rodeo Drive or Mont ego Bay. When parties are going through a divorce a more critical eye is cast at even the most wealthy.

Perhaps a $300 pair of jeans purchased monthly before a divorce was acceptable, in all likelihood once an action is started, it will not be. For most of us the purchase of a $2000.00 purse for a 12 year old girl is something we would never be able to justify....for those who live in the Hamptons apparently it becomes their justification for the purchase.

This Is The Hamptons...

In 1926 Fitzgerald published one of his finest stories, ''The Rich Boy,'' whose narrator begins it with the words ''Let me tell you about the very rich. They are different from you and me.''

More than 80 years later that statement rings as true today as it did then. Though Christie Brinkley opened up the east end to ridicule this summer with her high profile divorce, she is far from the only one from the east end showing us all here how different our lives are "Up Island." I actually found myself threatening to tell a judge in Central Islip about the extravagant spending of one litigant and expressing my belief that the judge would be appalled at such a revelation. The response to me shocked me all the more...."This is the Hamptons" I was told, as if this readily explained the extravagance that was displayed before me. Excess is Excess, whether it be in the Hamptons, Rodeo Drive or Mont ego Bay. When parties are going through a divorce a more critical eye is cast at even the most wealthy.

Perhaps a $300 pair of jeans purchased monthly before a divorce was acceptable, in all likelihood once an action is started, it will not be. For most of us the purchase of a $2000.00 purse for a 12 year old girl is something we would never be able to justify....for those who live in the Hamptons apparently it becomes their justification for the purchase.

How to Cope with Being Divorced and Single on Valentine's Day...

Well it's that time of year again. The stores are flooded with hearts, chocolates and corny greeting cards. Reminders are everywhere that the "day of love" is fast approaching. There is no escaping Valentine's Day. If you are divorced and not dating anyone special this can be a particularly painful time.

You may feel lonely and unloved and wonder if you will ever meet that someone special again. Many people dread being single this time of year. It can trigger emotions and memories of the past when you were married and in love. Now, single and alone, you may feel like you have nothing to look forward to this Valentine's Day.

But there are some ways to not only get through Valentine's day while being single, but actually enjoy it. One way is to call up your single friends and plan a night out on the town. Since you are all in the same situation, why not go out and have a fun night out? If you rather stay home with the kids, have your own Valentine's day party. Bake some red cupcakes, put some red food coloring in ginger ale for the kids and buy some pink champagne for yourself. Celebrate all of the love you have in your life, the love you feel for your children, parents, pets and friends.

Do anything that makes you feel happy and appreciative. Try not to dwell on what is missing in your life this Valentine's Day and instead focus on what you already have. With a positive attitude and a little planning, you may find yourself actually looking forward to Valentine's Day this year.

Click here to read a free chapter of Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce...

A Father's Nightmare and How You Can Help...

Did you watch Dateline last night? I was so shocked and upset

after hearing how New Jersey father David Goldman's has not been able

to see his son in four and a half years after his wife abducted the boy

in 2004 and fled to Brazil.

Since then David Goldman has been living a nightmare, fighting the Brazilian court system, trying to get back his son. The story become

even more bizarre when his wife (who divorced him in Brazil and married

a Brazilian Lawyer) died in August after giving birth to her second child.

Even though their son now has only one living parent, his ex-wife's husband will not give back Sean Goldman to his father and has even petitioned the Brazilian court to remove David Goldman's name form his own son's birth certificate. He has also defied a court order allowing Mr. Goldman a weekend visit with the boy by hiding the child.

It is frightening to think that a parent can kidnap a child, move to another country and get away with it. As divorced parents we need to send a clear message to our government and governments around the world that this is unacceptable. Sean Goldman is an American citizen who has been kidnapped, yet our government has not demanded the Brazilian government return the child.

Please go to www.bringseanhome.org and sign an online petition to help reunite Sean and his father. There are also other ways to help on the website. Let's help this divorced father get back his son.