The Dysfunctional Blended Family

We all need to remember that the Brady Bunch was just a television show. As well intentioned you all might be, a blended family can and will still invoke a certain amount of tension and stress. I guess you can say that even intact families experience a certain amount of tension and stress, but the uniqueness of the blended family can produce specific anxiety that the intact family cannot. Blended families where the children do not regularly reside within the family unit are the type which cause the biggest concern. When a blended child enters into the nuclear family for a visit, they immediately feel the difference in the way in which they were raised or are being raised. Many times these children live in a one parent households normally and upon entering a nuclear family where both a mother and father are present can bring some very negative feelings to the surface. These children regardless of their age are transported back to a time when they wished Dad or Mom were both present in their lives under the same roof. Unknowingly and unwittingly in an effort to fit into the new family dynamic, turmoil is likely to ensue. Usually it is the step parent of this child that feels the consequences of these negative feelings. The natural parent, may step outside the box and relish the company of his or her child and ignore the problems that may be swirling around them. What can be done about this situation? If the visit is short lived, then perhaps it is best to ignore the controversy. If the visit is of a longer duration perhaps it is best for all the parties involved to get into counselling.
What are the ramifications to the family? Usually the children do just fine,it is the marriage which suffers. Couples who find themselves in this situation need to remember why they got married in the first place.