One of the questions I get often is "How can I

write a book?". I think everyone has a story in

them that they want to share.

When I began writing my book, I knew very little

about publishers, editors, cover designers, interior

designers and printers. The process can be quite

overwhelming.

I started writing my book by simply opening up

a Microsoft word document and writing. Every evening I would

write after my kids were asleep. I then hired an editor to help me

edit the book, chapter by chapter.

Recently my good friend, Jess Kennedy Williams, author of

Heartbreak-Free Dating, created an amazing new book writing

program that helps you start writing your first book tonight.

Jess has done such great job simplifying the book writing process and providing invaluable resources every new author needs.

If you are thinking about writing your first book, Jess is giving away

a free 5 day mini-course with the steps that you need to begin writing your book right away. Go to: www.authorguru.com to sign up.

How wonderful it would be if everyone shared their life experiences and challenges to help and inspire others. Get your story told and impact the world!

The Devil You Know

A strange phenomena has reared its head in the land of divorce. I have heard this before but this week for some reason it has shown itself a few times. The client who feels their lives are better staying married rather than divorcing. Now, I am not speaking about an "intact" family where all parties live under the same roof, but rather the couple who has already physically separated, live their own lives, but for the fact that they share a "piece of paper" as they call it which declares them to be legally wed. These couples stay for years in this existence, presumably for the welfare of the children, though I can't for the life of me see what value this has other than to set a stage for confusion. As I said to one women yesterday, it is like your daughter telling you she is dating a married man, but that they really aren't married because they do their own thing like you and Dad. The client sat up straight in her chair and said she would kill her daughter if that ever happened, and maybe at that moment realized the hypocrisy of the life she was leading. Divorce is not like fine wine, it doesn't get better with time. There is no "good" time to divorce. Ideally of course the younger the children the less trauma to them emotionally, however, waiting until they are older and out of the house doesn't make it easier. Now there are more assets, more debt much more to argue about and to split up. I guess realistically it all comes down to the devil you know versus the devil you don't know. Everyone is nervous about change and one's future is never guaranteed. How many times have I heard from those going through difficult divorces, that they should have just kept their mouths shut and stayed married. In the end, most people are happy with the result and thrilled to move on with their lives, but the process can really be grueling. One thing I must insist upon again is counselling. I find it difficult to believe that a person is counselling cannot make a healthy decision about leaving their spouse. After all a spouse who lives in their own home and dates other people and basically lives their own life without the rest of the family is not a spouse at all.

The Devil You Know

A strange phenomena has reared its head in the land of divorce. I have heard this before but this week for some reason it has shown itself a few times. The client who feels their lives are better staying married rather than divorcing. Now, I am not speaking about an "intact" family where all parties live under the same roof, but rather the couple who has already physically separated, live their own lives, but for the fact that they share a "piece of paper" as they call it which declares them to be legally wed. These couples stay for years in this existence, presumably for the welfare of the children, though I can't for the life of me see what value this has other than to set a stage for confusion. As I said to one women yesterday, it is like your daughter telling you she is dating a married man, but that they really aren't married because they do their own thing like you and Dad. The client sat up straight in her chair and said she would kill her daughter if that ever happened, and maybe at that moment realized the hypocrisy of the life she was leading. Divorce is not like fine wine, it doesn't get better with time. There is no "good" time to divorce. Ideally of course the younger the children the less trauma to them emotionally, however, waiting until they are older and out of the house doesn't make it easier. Now there are more assets, more debt much more to argue about and to split up. I guess realistically it all comes down to the devil you know versus the devil you don't know. Everyone is nervous about change and one's future is never guaranteed. How many times have I heard from those going through difficult divorces, that they should have just kept their mouths shut and stayed married. In the end, most people are happy with the result and thrilled to move on with their lives, but the process can really be grueling. One thing I must insist upon again is counselling. I find it difficult to believe that a person is counselling cannot make a healthy decision about leaving their spouse. After all a spouse who lives in their own home and dates other people and basically lives their own life without the rest of the family is not a spouse at all.

Dear Friend,
I am celebrating the official launch of my book Seven Secrets to a Successful divorce in a big way.
My goal is to make Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce a NUMBER ONE BEST- SELLER on Amazon.com on Thursday, April 12, 2007 and with your help I can do it!
I wrote this book because I learned the hard way about divorce. I was a happily married mother of four when she caught my husband cheating and my life spiraled out of control. What followed were two years of hell. i went through it all, money problems, dealing with a deadbeat ex-husband, navigating the court system, corrupt lawyers and more.
Eventually my life got better. I made it through the storm. In my hard hitting, tell all book, I reveal the secrets to a successful divorce for women. I share the survival skills you must know to have a positive divorce outcome.
Because of my difficult divorce and my desire to help other women and children, I am donating 100% of the profits from Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce to The Child Support Disaster Relief Fund when you purchase the book on April 12th (which is also my birthday!) at amazon.com .
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm
You will also receive over $700 in valuable gifts from some incredible well-known authors and businesses when you purchase the book. Just go to www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm to order Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce on April 12, 2007.
Imagine how good it will feel to help another human being go for a goal...a dream…go for what is in her heart and ATTAIN it!
You can feel good that 100% of the profits today from the sale of the book is going to help children who are suffering.
There are 17 million children in the U.S who do not receive child support. No hurricane, fire or flood devastates more children. With your help today, we can make a difference.
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm
Thank you for making Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce a number ONE best-seller. Your effort to make this happen is appreciated more than you will ever know. May your kindness and willingness to help someone else be returned to you blessed and multiplied.

PS- please forward this email to your friends. Let's remember the single mothers today who are struggling to make ends meet and support their children. Non-payment of child support is an issuethat affects us all. Many women are forced to go on welfare or lose their homes. Today we can help.
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm

Mandatory Therapy

I will be adding a new section to my retainer wherein the client agrees to begin therapy sessions within 5 days of retaining my services or I will have the right to terminate my representation of them immediately. The reason is that I and my staff are spending way too much time holding hysterical client's hands and not enough time practicing law. Today alone, I need to meet with a client who has been told numerous times what to do about her mentally abusive husband and I have explained ad naseum what we are doing on her case. Regardless of this she is stressing to the point of neurosis. I will be talking her off the ledge today as I once again tell her to change the locks on her home and contact the police if hubby tries to intrude. Answering the question about my plan of action, I will again reiterate that as long as he is paying EVERY bill in the house and she is getting money on top of that AND the case is moving along with him paying for ALL appraisals it is ok to just wait and let things progress. Why is he always winning?? I keep getting asked. He does not win when he is paying for everything. He does not win when he is out of the house. He does not win when he has to make appointments to see his kids. The court has certain proceedures which must be followed. I explain this over and over again and certain clients will act as if they are hearing this for the first time each time. On the other hand my male clients, who by the way usually listen to me and get into counselling, are less likely to go off the deep end. When they do however, it is because they are paying everything and want it to stop, at some point. These are the cases I usually push on harder to either settle or to get through with discovery so we can set a trial date.
After my meeting my client apologized for her behavior. She is loaded with stress and beleive me I understand that well. Learning how to deal with the stress is why a therapist is required. Please don't tell me you have had a hard time getting an appointment, just get one.

Mandatory Therapy

I will be adding a new section to my retainer wherein the client agrees to begin therapy sessions within 5 days of retaining my services or I will have the right to terminate my representation of them immediately. The reason is that I and my staff are spending way too much time holding hysterical client's hands and not enough time practicing law. Today alone, I need to meet with a client who has been told numerous times what to do about her mentally abusive husband and I have explained ad naseum what we are doing on her case. Regardless of this she is stressing to the point of neurosis. I will be talking her off the ledge today as I once again tell her to change the locks on her home and contact the police if hubby tries to intrude. Answering the question about my plan of action, I will again reiterate that as long as he is paying EVERY bill in the house and she is getting money on top of that AND the case is moving along with him paying for ALL appraisals it is ok to just wait and let things progress. Why is he always winning?? I keep getting asked. He does not win when he is paying for everything. He does not win when he is out of the house. He does not win when he has to make appointments to see his kids. The court has certain proceedures which must be followed. I explain this over and over again and certain clients will act as if they are hearing this for the first time each time. On the other hand my male clients, who by the way usually listen to me and get into counselling, are less likely to go off the deep end. When they do however, it is because they are paying everything and want it to stop, at some point. These are the cases I usually push on harder to either settle or to get through with discovery so we can set a trial date.
After my meeting my client apologized for her behavior. She is loaded with stress and beleive me I understand that well. Learning how to deal with the stress is why a therapist is required. Please don't tell me you have had a hard time getting an appointment, just get one.

Angry Deadbeat Dads Protest Pizza Place

The Deadbeat Dads are upset because a Ohio child

enforcement agency worked has put their pictures on pizza boxes at

three local pizzerias.

They decided to hold a protest outside one of the pizzerias this weekend.

Instead of complaining about how "unfair" it is that they have to pay support and that the court system is out to get them, why don't they use their time more wisely and go out and work so they can pay the support the owe? This way they won't have to worry about seeing themselves on a pizza box the next time they order pizza.

I am starting to get some emails from angry deadbeats myself. Here is one

I received today:

"Why do you people keep saying child support goes to the children? It goes to the custodial parent (mom) and she does whatever she wants with it. It's a blatant lie to describe it any other way. You are duplicitous and clueless about the realities of the system and it's effects on children. You care about mom not the children."

Here is my reply:

"I think the children need to come first, not the parents.
As a mother of four children whose ex-husband did not pay
child support for a year, I think I do know first hand how
devastating it is to the children. My ex left his family with no money,
a mortgage, credit card bills and household expenses.

The child support my ex now pays goes to feed my children and
that is about as far as it goes. I pay for all
clothing,activities, sports,camp ect.. Not to mention the roof over
the heads.

I do not know your situation. But did you know there are
also mothers who do not pay child support? There are much
more men, hence the term "deadbeat dads".

Most women who do not receive support for their kids
are struggling to take care of them.Do some women abuse
the system? Possibly, I have not personally encounter a
single mom who has used her children's support for herself, but
I am guessing that you may have. The majority are just trying to support
their kids in the best way that they can. It is hard to be a single
parent with sole financial responsibility for your children.

Thank you for writing. I hope your situation, whatever it may
be improves."

So what do you think? Do you agree with me that Deadbeat parents

should be displayed on pizza boxes?