A HAND IN SUPPORT

At the weekend I watched a bird of prey demonstration. Apparently Bengal Eagle Owls like to live in pairs and the female pictured above was rescued from a poor home to enjoy domestic bliss with a male counterpart, who had always enjoyed a somewhat pampered life. Needless to say they had a series of marital tiffs resulting in a separation and the female ending up working for a living. It was with something of a sense of déjà vue that my hand was therefore sought for support during the course of the display of her hunting abilities!

October 12.....


When the new No Fault law kicks in on October 12th there will be rejoicing in the streets.....NOT. The new law has come out for those practitioners to review and it is filled with ambiguity and rules open to some pretty intense interpretation.  As it stands now judges on the bench don't always agree with the ways in which equitable distribution is plays out in their courtroom and that law has been in effect since 1985.  It will be foolish to think that this new law with all its bells and whistles will have a shot of being the effective tool which would speed divorces along in the system it is being touted to be.

Everything will need to be tested. All aspects of it will be challenged. The only good news is that Fault will be one less thing which will be litigated, but it will not be replaces by a more convoluted maintenance system...formally known as alimony.

Maybe more attorneys will get paid for their services, that would be a good thing.  Or maybe we will just have more judgements out there against litigants who still can't pay....that would be a horrible thing.

Change is always scary and litigants and no one can predict with any great accuracy to a litigant where they will fall under this new law. To be sure it tends to favor the non monied spouse, but since the one with the money usually possess most of the power, I am reluctant to say that without funds a litigant will be on equal footing with a partner who has access to funds.

It's been a busy fall as usual, relationships that have held together during the summer vacation times are apt to come apart once the routines of school and life settle upon them again.

We will work through this process as we work through everything else, and those who are miserable should not be deterred from trying to give themselves a better life. As miserable as divorce litigation is, the alternative is much worse. Quality of life must be weighed...and a decision must be made based not on the new laws that are out there but on the value one places on peace, and happiness....life really is short....can I interest you in a cheeseburger in paradise?

October 12.....


When the new No Fault law kicks in on October 12th there will be rejoicing in the streets.....NOT. The new law has come out for those practitioners to review and it is filled with ambiguity and rules open to some pretty intense interpretation.  As it stands now judges on the bench don't always agree with the ways in which equitable distribution is plays out in their courtroom and that law has been in effect since 1985.  It will be foolish to think that this new law with all its bells and whistles will have a shot of being the effective tool which would speed divorces along in the system it is being touted to be.

Everything will need to be tested. All aspects of it will be challenged. The only good news is that Fault will be one less thing which will be litigated, but it will not be replaces by a more convoluted maintenance system...formally known as alimony.

Maybe more attorneys will get paid for their services, that would be a good thing.  Or maybe we will just have more judgements out there against litigants who still can't pay....that would be a horrible thing.

Change is always scary and litigants and no one can predict with any great accuracy to a litigant where they will fall under this new law. To be sure it tends to favor the non monied spouse, but since the one with the money usually possess most of the power, I am reluctant to say that without funds a litigant will be on equal footing with a partner who has access to funds.

It's been a busy fall as usual, relationships that have held together during the summer vacation times are apt to come apart once the routines of school and life settle upon them again.

We will work through this process as we work through everything else, and those who are miserable should not be deterred from trying to give themselves a better life. As miserable as divorce litigation is, the alternative is much worse. Quality of life must be weighed...and a decision must be made based not on the new laws that are out there but on the value one places on peace, and happiness....life really is short....can I interest you in a cheeseburger in paradise?

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AN ASSAULT

Having discovered early in life that I suffer from disco leg, I don’t rock-climb (nor indeed dance for that matter) preferring to leave the ropes, shackles and vertical ascents to Outdoor and Apprentice Men, joined on the occasional foray by Little Girl. I do however regularly skim books and magazines on the subject when the others leave them within reach. Whilst away in the Lake District recently I, therefore, found myself reading about climbing routes on Pavey Ark. It became apparent that as new routes are discovered they are given more and more flamboyant names, but one I really have to take issue with, Extreme 4 or not, is Assault and Matrimony. Whatever could have been going through the minds of those original climbers? Assault is a criminal offence and coupled with matrimony is domestic violence as well. Maybe they could think about calling the next one Assault Me Divorce You.

CROSSWORDS

I really do enjoy crosswords. Not those that sometimes pass between my clients and their estranged spouses but as in word games and puzzles. With that in mind let me give you two clues which I think are particularly appropriate for this blog:
1. One is apart (anagram) when marriage breaks down.
2. Death or award, on termination of marriage.

STRESSFUL TIMES

I’m told that going on holiday ranks amongst life’s top ten stressful events. Yes, that choking, stifling panic that sets in affects millions of us as the big departure day approaches. In my case, with three weeks between a wet week sailing in Scottish waters and a damp week walking in the Lake District, I suppose I should know. Indeed it probably manifested itself with “blog-block” and hence the paucity of entries here last month. However if you did suffer from stress as you prepared for your annual vacation remember that it still ranks below moving home or child-birth and doesn’t even begin to compare with divorce which occupies one of the highest rankings.

Was there ever a time when human life was stress-free? I guess not. Whilst stone-age hunter gatherers may not have had blogs to write or divorce to contend with, the fear of being clubbed over the head and dragged across the plain by one’s hair must have loomed large; that and being trampled by a woolly mammoth.