Dating During Divorce

Dating while a divorce is pending is always a bad idea and should be avoided. The effect it will have on your legal case is something which most individuals rarely realize. The most important aspect of the case which will be affected is that you will cause your spouse to have undue anger and turn a case which might otherwise have been settled easily, amicably and inexpensively into a difficult, acrimonious and expensive battle. The spouse most often than not becomes irrational and turns the case into a battlefield for revenge making settlement difficult if not impossible.

The spouse may also try to turn the children and other family and friends against the dating spouse.
Additionally the non-dating spouse will try to justify to themselves and those around them that the divorce was caused by the dating spouse's need to cheat. Regardless of the ultimate reasons for the divorce, the non dating spouse will look to vindicate themselves and seek empathy from others.

In the event the children become aware of the situation, this may cause the children to feel that the dating spouse has abandoned the other parent and they will therefore sympathize or align themselves with the other parent.

While a divorce is pending and for months after, individuals go through many changes emotionally. This is not usually a good time to make life decisions and entering into any long term relationship at this juncture is a mistake.

Legally the impact this can have on your case regarding custody and parenting time should also not be underestimated. Besides the non dating spouse being else likely to want to settle these issues on a reasonable basis, the children may express their desire to spend less time with the dating spouse in the event that the "friend" is present. Judges and experts who assist the court in making custody and parenting time determinations are not impressed with a person who dates during a divorce. Dating shows callousness toward the feelings of the children and could be considered poor role modeling for the children. The dating parent is viewed by the court as selfish and self centered and this decision could in fact tip the scales in cases where all other factors are equal.

The best advice any divorce attorney can give a client is DO NOT DATE DURING DIVORCE. NEVER MOVE IN WITH A BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND. However, if you feel you must date, be as discreet as possible, preferably not allowing anyone to know you are dating. Wait a reasonable time after the divorce is over before introducing your date to your children.
In the event you are found out however, expect your otherwise "easy" and "quick" divorce to turn long, ugly and potentially disastrous.