The Ever Younger clientele

If I had done the math first her age of 26 would not have shocked me, it was the year of her birth 1980, which sent me reeling. 1980 was a year after I graduated from High School. To me it seems unreal to me that a person who had not even been conceived as I marched down the aisle in my graduation robes who be sitting in front of me asking for information on a divorce. The problem I continue to face is a dilemma I wrote about in my last post regarding spousal ignorance. The young girl in front of me a self stated "homemaker" knew nothing about the marital finances. Unlike her mother and grandmother before her however, when I asked her if she was educated she sited two different degrees to her credit. My concern is her absence from the workforce from the time of earning these degrees to the present. Yes, she does have potential but no experience. This will lead only to entry level positions giving her another disadvantage in the matrimonial war.

Although this sounds like a put down to stay at home moms my statement reflects only my experience with marriages. Not all marriages last, in fact if we believe the statistics the odds are against marriage. Any women who cannot support herself and sometimes her child will be at a severe disadvantage and may either be forced to remain in the marriage or substantially change her lifestyle.

So what is it that I suggest? Keep a toe in the water in your chosen career, even if only on a part time basis. Act as a consultant, intern, anything to keep yourself in the loop of your profession. When I decided to take a year off after the birth of my second son, I did pro bono work out of the house, just to keep myself involved in the legal community and keep my contacts. Keeping contacts fresh and connected is the second rule if you decide to stay at home. These are the people who will help you locate a position when you are ready to enter the workforce again. Also keep abreast of any updates or changes in your profession. Things change all the time and keeping up with your career will hold you in good stead in the future. Finally be sure to keep up with your license or continuing education requirements for your degree or license. Again you never know when you will be thrust back into the workforce and the independence that you will achieve can get you through the bumps which may arise in your life.

No one enters marriage preparing for divorce, but everyone should be prepared to support themselves and their children if the need arises.

The Ever Younger clientele

If I had done the math first her age of 26 would not have shocked me, it was the year of her birth 1980, which sent me reeling. 1980 was a year after I graduated from High School. To me it seems unreal to me that a person who had not even been conceived as I marched down the aisle in my graduation robes who be sitting in front of me asking for information on a divorce. The problem I continue to face is a dilemma I wrote about in my last post regarding spousal ignorance. The young girl in front of me a self stated "homemaker" knew nothing about the marital finances. Unlike her mother and grandmother before her however, when I asked her if she was educated she sited two different degrees to her credit. My concern is her absence from the workforce from the time of earning these degrees to the present. Yes, she does have potential but no experience. This will lead only to entry level positions giving her another disadvantage in the matrimonial war.

Although this sounds like a put down to stay at home moms my statement reflects only my experience with marriages. Not all marriages last, in fact if we believe the statistics the odds are against marriage. Any women who cannot support herself and sometimes her child will be at a severe disadvantage and may either be forced to remain in the marriage or substantially change her lifestyle.

So what is it that I suggest? Keep a toe in the water in your chosen career, even if only on a part time basis. Act as a consultant, intern, anything to keep yourself in the loop of your profession. When I decided to take a year off after the birth of my second son, I did pro bono work out of the house, just to keep myself involved in the legal community and keep my contacts. Keeping contacts fresh and connected is the second rule if you decide to stay at home. These are the people who will help you locate a position when you are ready to enter the workforce again. Also keep abreast of any updates or changes in your profession. Things change all the time and keeping up with your career will hold you in good stead in the future. Finally be sure to keep up with your license or continuing education requirements for your degree or license. Again you never know when you will be thrust back into the workforce and the independence that you will achieve can get you through the bumps which may arise in your life.

No one enters marriage preparing for divorce, but everyone should be prepared to support themselves and their children if the need arises.

Spousal Ignorance

The theme for today is spousal ignorance and the need for each spouse to become familiar with the financial aspects of a marriage. Over the last few weeks there seems to be an ever increasing number of mostly female clients coming into my office with absolutely no knowledge of the financial aspects of the marriage. These women have be "sheltered" by their husband from the intricacies of the financial obligations of the parties rendering them virtually powerless in participating in many decision having an impact over their lives. Stories abound about Husbands taking out equity loans and refinancing the marital residence with little to no input from their wives doing things with the money and leaving the wife holding half the debt at the break up of the marriage without knowing what the funds were used to pay. Wives entering my office with little more than the passed year's income tax statement advising me that they have been too busy with the children to participate in the financial end of things ultimately have given a huge advance to their husbands in the event of a breakup.

Every woman (and man, though this is rare) must be sure to have full knowledge of every bill that is paid within the household. Each woman needs to know what debts are outstanding and to whom they are owed. Each woman needs to take responsibility for signing her name to any and all legal documents, including tax returns; loan applications; closing documents. Every wife is responsible as an adult over the age of 18 for her actions. The fact that she blindly trusted her spouse is not an excuse that any court will be willing to consider. More importantly it empowers her spouse into believing he can get away with anything and obligate her to things which she may never be able to recover from financially.

The woman who blinding believes that her life is pleasurable and chooses not to be a part of the finances, is setting herself up for a huge fall. Unless she is well educated and readily employable or has a separate resource fund from which she may draw, these women are destined to either remain in a potentially abusive relationship or fall prey to a long drawn out divorce proceeding, begging family or friends to finance their litigation.

Knowledge is power and ultimately it is also a necessity. In an age where nothing is guaranteed least of all a "happy ever after" ending to a marriage, we must all be prepared to forge through with or without a spouse at our side. The children's needs remain constant or escalate and the fact that Mom or Dad cannot meet these will not be met with sympathy by the court. The children always come first. In order to properly meet these needs both parties must be partners in the financial affairs of the marriage. Be aware; Become aware; Do not sleepwalk through your financial lives, your children may someday need to depend on your knowledge or suffer for your lack thereof.

Spousal Ignorance

The theme for today is spousal ignorance and the need for each spouse to become familiar with the financial aspects of a marriage. Over the last few weeks there seems to be an ever increasing number of mostly female clients coming into my office with absolutely no knowledge of the financial aspects of the marriage. These women have be "sheltered" by their husband from the intricacies of the financial obligations of the parties rendering them virtually powerless in participating in many decision having an impact over their lives. Stories abound about Husbands taking out equity loans and refinancing the marital residence with little to no input from their wives doing things with the money and leaving the wife holding half the debt at the break up of the marriage without knowing what the funds were used to pay. Wives entering my office with little more than the passed year's income tax statement advising me that they have been too busy with the children to participate in the financial end of things ultimately have given a huge advance to their husbands in the event of a breakup.

Every woman (and man, though this is rare) must be sure to have full knowledge of every bill that is paid within the household. Each woman needs to know what debts are outstanding and to whom they are owed. Each woman needs to take responsibility for signing her name to any and all legal documents, including tax returns; loan applications; closing documents. Every wife is responsible as an adult over the age of 18 for her actions. The fact that she blindly trusted her spouse is not an excuse that any court will be willing to consider. More importantly it empowers her spouse into believing he can get away with anything and obligate her to things which she may never be able to recover from financially.

The woman who blinding believes that her life is pleasurable and chooses not to be a part of the finances, is setting herself up for a huge fall. Unless she is well educated and readily employable or has a separate resource fund from which she may draw, these women are destined to either remain in a potentially abusive relationship or fall prey to a long drawn out divorce proceeding, begging family or friends to finance their litigation.

Knowledge is power and ultimately it is also a necessity. In an age where nothing is guaranteed least of all a "happy ever after" ending to a marriage, we must all be prepared to forge through with or without a spouse at our side. The children's needs remain constant or escalate and the fact that Mom or Dad cannot meet these will not be met with sympathy by the court. The children always come first. In order to properly meet these needs both parties must be partners in the financial affairs of the marriage. Be aware; Become aware; Do not sleepwalk through your financial lives, your children may someday need to depend on your knowledge or suffer for your lack thereof.

“With Christina Rowe’s help and coaching I was able to find a great attorney. I am now able to provide my children with the financial security that they deserve. This book is a must read for any woman going through a divorce”

Cindy, mother of two

“When my ex-husband refused to pay medical expenses for our children, I was able to bring him back to court without paying a lawyer. After reading Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know I was successful in court and saved myself a lot of money in attorney fees”

Sophia Demeson, mother of three

“How I wish I had read this book 5 years ago! I suffered through a long, painful divorce. If the information in this book was available to me back then I would have saved myself money, time and heartache”

Ginny Fredrick

“I am currently going through a complicated divorce. I now know how to protect myself financially thanks to this book. If you are going through a divorce I highly recommend you read Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know by Christina Rowe. It is a lifesaver”


Christine Vela



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Internet Regulation on Attorney Advertising
It seems the internet has finally attracted the attention of the powers that be in the state of New York regarding attorney advertising and web sites. It was bound to happen I guess, but as usual the rules at first blush (usually until tested in court) are outrageously vague as far as what is and is not allowed on websites maintained by attorneys. The first rule that troubles me is the one about client "testimonials." It seems the committee feels that current clients who are pleased with their attorney cannot be quoted expressing such thoughts on the attorney's website. What about a client who is still a client (many of us have those perpetual clients who although they do not have an active case at present..keep us on a retainer of sorts in the event something should occur)but does not have an active case? What about a client who is a repeat client somewhere down the road? Does the website have to be updated each time a former client becomes a new client again? Updating the website is also going to be problematic according to the rules. It seems that wherever a web site is updated, the update must be sent in to the commitee. What is up with that??? The Disciplinary committee seems to want to keep close tabs on all attorney websites in this state. Now for my favorite restriction. No pictures of Court Houses. Well, does that mean no specific court house or are all generic pictures of court houses in general prohibited. Are we as attorneys expected to present to our clients pictures of gymnasiums instead??? We are lawyers, we frequent court houses, why in the world are we not allowed to show a picture of even a generic court house on our websites? Or are we allowed and do they simply not want us to associate ourselves with a particular courthouse for fear it may seem like a misrepresentation to the public that we have a particular "in" at a certain courthouse if we depict it on our website. Now that is only a guess but hey, if I put a picture of the White House on my website, would that imply that I have an "in" with the President??
Forgive my frustration, but in our business we are paid to fine tune the law and help to interpret it for the public. When our own rule makers make rules which are general and vague, they not only cause mass confusion, but invite litigation or challenges which only tend to forestall the restrictions they seem anxious to put in place supposedly not just for the protection of the public, but for attorneys as well.

Internet Regulation on Attorney Advertising
It seems the internet has finally attracted the attention of the powers that be in the state of New York regarding attorney advertising and web sites. It was bound to happen I guess, but as usual the rules at first blush (usually until tested in court) are outrageously vague as far as what is and is not allowed on websites maintained by attorneys. The first rule that troubles me is the one about client "testimonials." It seems the committee feels that current clients who are pleased with their attorney cannot be quoted expressing such thoughts on the attorney's website. What about a client who is still a client (many of us have those perpetual clients who although they do not have an active case at present..keep us on a retainer of sorts in the event something should occur)but does not have an active case? What about a client who is a repeat client somewhere down the road? Does the website have to be updated each time a former client becomes a new client again? Updating the website is also going to be problematic according to the rules. It seems that wherever a web site is updated, the update must be sent in to the commitee. What is up with that??? The Disciplinary committee seems to want to keep close tabs on all attorney websites in this state. Now for my favorite restriction. No pictures of Court Houses. Well, does that mean no specific court house or are all generic pictures of court houses in general prohibited. Are we as attorneys expected to present to our clients pictures of gymnasiums instead??? We are lawyers, we frequent court houses, why in the world are we not allowed to show a picture of even a generic court house on our websites? Or are we allowed and do they simply not want us to associate ourselves with a particular courthouse for fear it may seem like a misrepresentation to the public that we have a particular "in" at a certain courthouse if we depict it on our website. Now that is only a guess but hey, if I put a picture of the White House on my website, would that imply that I have an "in" with the President??
Forgive my frustration, but in our business we are paid to fine tune the law and help to interpret it for the public. When our own rule makers make rules which are general and vague, they not only cause mass confusion, but invite litigation or challenges which only tend to forestall the restrictions they seem anxious to put in place supposedly not just for the protection of the public, but for attorneys as well.

Hello,

My name is Christina Rowe and I am the author of the upcoming book Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know. I learned the hard way about the perils of divorce. I was a happily married woman with four children. Then I caught my husband cheating and my life spiraled out of control. What followed were two years of hell. I went through it all: money problems,dealing with a deadbeat ex-husband,navigating the court system,corrupt lawyers and more.
Eventually my life got better. I made it through the storm. In my hard hitting, tell-all book I share with you the secrets to a successful divorce for women. I share my story and give you specific tips and recommendations on how not to be taken advantage of during your own divorce process. I will teach you down to earth survival skills that will save you time, money and heartache during your divorce. I would like to share some of those tips here and would love to hear about your own divorce and how I can help you!